These little flowers are known as “helleborus niger” and are commonly called “Christmas Roses” because of their resilience and propensity to bloom midwinter, even bursting through the snow. I loved how they protest the chill and despair of winter. At the same time they are poisonous, which gives them something eerie—not all fluff and brightness—when you look at them. Unfortunately these beautiful little conflicted lights-in-dark-places are susceptible to a “black death” virus. This virus shows itself with black spots and veins all over the leaves and petals. The sadness in this virus comes in that it means certain death, for there is no cure for the plant. Not only that, but the entire plant must be dug up and destroyed or the death will spread through the soil from one hellebore plant to another.
I drew these flowers alongside a poetic paraphrase of a lament Psalm. In laments so often the writer asks the question, "Why this choking blackness, why this heartache with unknown purpose?" The beauty in the laments of Scripture however is that when the human heart becomes overwhelmed it doesn't flee from God, but rather asks the questions directly to God, knowing that while He may be silent, He is present. Laments are not meant to answer the questions, but rather to ask them, to be so very human, and to feel the heaviness in the presence of God.
These flowers are a reminder to me that the world is not the way its supposed to be, and that I can acknowledge this in the presence of the One who created it and who will one day make all things new.
With Easter upon us, may you lean into the Good Friday sorrow, and then look to the hope the Resurrection. Jesus is the first-fruits of death being defeated. One day it will be complete, but for now, fall on Him, cry out with your questions, and know that He is present.